MD vs MM

sickpig

Dr: “Ma’am, I’m going to put you on a ‘clear liquids only’ diet. And if your home is on fire, you may leave the building; other than that, you better stay put.”

Mummy: “You min’ dat doctuh. Tekka he doan pronounce ya dead pun arrival.”

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Made a brief visit to the Emergency Room today. Seem to have come down with ominous “flu-like symptoms”. It is indeed a matter of fact that the presence of the H1N1 virus at my place of work is confirmed. This seems to be causing my loved ones significant concern. As far as I am concerned, regular flu or pig flu, ‘all-two both’ feel bad. As the MD said, it doesn’t matter how the virus is numbered, it’s clear that I have one, so let’s get to treating it. Here is where the MM comes in….

Been keeping MM (mummy) up to date, ever since I first started feeling ill. Figured she might want a heads up in case I keel over. Funny enough, although the furthest away and less able to help, she didn’t freak out at all. Once I got home from the hospital, I reported on the MD’s diagnosis and prognosis. She had her own take on a couple of things. As she always tends to. When it comes to things medical, she and MM senior (MaMa, my grand-mother), have always been my first point of reference for remedies. I list the main symptoms and in a matter of minutes, I’ll have my remedy: either a good purge with some bush tea, or to rub down with menthol and eucalyptus, or a strong cup of ginger and garlic. So here’s what the MD and the MM ordered.

gatoradeQ (2)
MD: “Strictly clear fluids, get some Gatorade.”

MM: “Sugar-water with lil’ salt in it. Doan push up ya face – use it!”

MT (My Take): Sugar/Salt mix – ding-ding-ding

Gatorade is supposed to one-up water due to its electro-lyte replacement properties. Mummy says the sugar and salt will aid my mineral retention. The Gatorade cost me $3.99. The Sugar/Salt mix cost me the energy it took to swing open my cupboard. Read the ingredients on the Gatorade bottle (which now contains the sugar/salt mix), and – inaddition to a couple other things I can neither spell nor pronounce – it contains high fructose corn syrup – I’m not a great fan. I can both spell and pronounce water, sugar and salt.

———————————————

MD: “You’ve been eating fruits and soup? Ma’am, I would suggest you stop all of that – If you can’t see through it, don’t soupeat or drink it! You can have the broth, but that’s it for the next three days.”

MM: “In three days, you won’t be able to even lift a bottle. Drink de lil soup. Just make sure you put back in some liquids when you go to the bathroom.”

MT: Drinking the soup – ding-ding-ding

Two hours after getting home from the hospital, I was again having some serious bad feels. Weak. Dizzy. Can’t move. Belly-hurt. I called the MM: “Mummy,” I whined, “I doan feel good…” In two-twos, she was yelling at me to get up and eat – “You min’ dat doctuh. Tekka he doan pronounce ya dead pun arrival.” As she cojoled on the phone, I dragged myself up. Drank some Sprite. Found the peppermint oil. Heated some soup. In half hour, I felt like a new woman. In 45 minutes, I was on the toilet. But I sure felt better. Plus, I had my sugar/salt mix to pump back in the liquids ;-).

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garlic & ginger

MM: “Try and boil some garlic. You ain got no ginger to put in it? If ya gotta hol’ ya nose, drink it!”

MT: Um…if necessary.
This has been the age-old combo for fighting just about everything in my family. While I have never doubted its medicinal qualities, it has always been kind of a last resort. It’s not exactly a fragrant combo. I do know, though, that both have natural antibiotic qualities. I’m sure a quick google might turn up even more great properties. Well I did boil the garlic, unfortunately I’m out of ginger. But I think the soup and the sugar/salt will hold me for now.

sick

Well since I’m on quarantine now, my boredom might drag me back to Allegiance as a release for my currently caged mental faculties. Thanks to all of you for keeping my virtual company. *cough cough*

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One response to “MD vs MM

  • jdid

    lol, leave it to bajan parents.
    its true though, the garlic, the ginger, the salt the sugar. lil lemon too
    its all better than gatorade thats for sure.

    hope you feel better soon

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